good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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