I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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