Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize