I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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