Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
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