The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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