I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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