google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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