Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize
