1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I just had sex on a roof
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
