you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
