You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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