Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
