it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize
