I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
