I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Randomize
