Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
i came on her dog
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
