Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
