so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Randomize
