yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
We got so high we made milksteak
He passed out mid-signature
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
