He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
