Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
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