so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
