Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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