woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
