My underwear smells like fireworks.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
