i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
