Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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