Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
