You can't special order awesome
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Randomize
