I want to have your abortion
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
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