The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
