She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
