the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
