He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Yo dont text me then not text me
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
