kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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