Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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