5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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