yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
