we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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