the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
