I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Let's paint friendship bongs
I won't apologize to a one balled man
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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