i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
