i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
This is my life. Enjoy the view
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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