She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
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