I wish I could punch you in the face.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
This toilet bowl is my home.
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