chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Randomize
