new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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