What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
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