a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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