i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
